How To Save Your Relationship With These 3 Counterintuitive Steps
Trying to save your relationship, or rekindle a broken relationship with an ex can be a very difficult thing to do. There are a lot of obstacles you must face, not the least of which is the inevitable emotional roller coaster a breakup can cause. Suffice it to say that your state-of-mind, and therefore your ability to make objective rational decisions is severely compromised. . Most people in these situations are very concerned that one wrong decision, just one wrong move and you might lose the person you love forever.
It's one of those times in your life when your emotions are telling you the exact wrong things to do. Yes, your emotions are telling you it "feels" like the right move. Unfortunately, what feels like the right thing to do, is almost always wrong in these cases.
An easy way to prove this to yourself is to run your ideas by a trusted friend, maybe one male and one female, and get their opinion. Usually, you will quickly find out that you should be following the 'counterintuitive path'. If you feel like calling him or her, don't. Act as is you are "over it" and are moving on with your life. Go out with other friends. Maybe even date other people. If you feel like pouring your heart out, put a lid on it for now.
A word of caution, the techniques you're about to discover may be brand new to you and at first glance may simply feel wrong. That's normal and it's why they're called "counterintuitive" techniques. But the good news is that they have been proven time and time again to be effective even what seem to be hopeless situations.
Counterintuitive Step #1
The first step is to begin to accept the fact that your ex has broken up with you. Yes, this can be difficult and will take time, but acceptance is part Moving on. Ironically, by accepting the break-up as fact, you can actually start to take steps to mend the relationship. When your ex sees you "moving on" you often become more attractive to him or her again, particularly if the breakup is fairly new.
Counterintuitive Step #2
The second step is to cut off all communication, that is, don't initiate any communication. Now don't click away or close your browser after reading that sentence. Yes, the second step is to cut off communication. We've seen this technique work absolute miracles is actually getting the lines of communication open again and 99% of the time, it's the ex that initiates the contact. Why? Curiosity and some jealousy. It shows your ex you are serious.
By not communicating, you are getting your ex to think about you, how you're doing, and also thinking a little deeper about the reasons for the breakup. This "communication ban" will also be good for your mental health. It will help you become more objective and set you up for Step #3.
Counterintuitive Step #3
The third step is to plan a casual get together with your ex. Nothing romantic or "high pressure", just coffee, lunch, something in a public place where you can catch up on how each of you has been doing. Again, and this is the key part of step 3, act casual and even a little distant, maybe an occasional glance at your watch, a little mystery about how you've been spending your time. The goal is to arouse curiosity and interest in your ex. When he or she sees how well you're doing, believe us when we say they're going to want to know more.
Try out these 3 steps. You may be pleasantly surprised.
The next article gives you solid advice on How To Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back When He Wants Space.
